Starlight Starbright

My weekly horoscope from the Onion. So true, so true.

Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
You will raise procrastination to an art form, providing dozens of industrious critics with a new livelihood.

I amaze myself at my laziness and inability to get anything done....

Last week The Onion also got it right:

Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
You'll cry because you have no shoes, but you frickin' cry at everything.

Finally, a point of laughter: You know how on the Simpsons, Marge sees a twelve spice spice rack and she's like, 'OR EH GONE OH', what's that?'...the Brits say oregano like that...